I’m about to share with you the Eva Starr method of eliminating the “C” word from your life. WARNING: This is much easier said than done, and I will grant you a world of time to accomplish this feat. After all I’ve been working on this one since I spit the pacifier out of my mouth, “I’ll decide how I want to soothe myself,” I thought, as my mom would shove the damn thing back into my mouth.
What is the seven-letter word that could be ruining your life? C-O-N-T-R-O-L. Not only could it be ruining your life but the sad part is, YOU are allowing it, self-sabotaging yourself, your relationships and your business while you spend sleepless nights worrying about how “you” can control the “outcome” of whatever it is that isn’t working. LOL, go ahead, you may LOL again!
I have learned a lot in the past week since I’ve been on a “work” vacation. I took time off work because I needed to catch up on a lot of business stuff, learning how to operate Windows 8.1 for one, (my last version was a 10 year old version of XP.) I’ve lost my patience, I’ve lost my sanity, I’ve lost all motivation and enthusiasm, and at times I’ve lost hold of the “WHY” I’m doing all of this in the first place.
Before I take you any further, let’s find out if you qualify for a control freak in the first place, most control freaks DO NOT think they’re control freaks. Here’s your signs:
- You intervene on behalf of others, trying to explain or dismiss their behavior
- You judge others’ behavior, withholding attention until they fall in line with your expectations, OUCH! (The silent treatment is a MASTER form of control)
- You don’t believe in imperfection, and you don’t believe anyone else should either
Control Freak Quote - You have a hard time with ambiguity and NOT knowing something…double ouch!
- You believe that if someone would change one or two things about themselves, you’d be happier; so you try and “help them” change
- You present worse-case-scenarios in an attempt to influence them away from certain behaviors and move them toward others, (fear mongering)
- You offer “constructive criticism” as an attempt to advance your own agenda
- You change who you are or what you believe so someone will accept you
Take this Psychology Today Quiz (I scored better than I thought, I’m better at some questions than others, so it balances out) PS This one is different than the eight points above, so do both and combine your answers.
Here’s my advice to help you relinquish control in the areas of life where you need to “loosen up.”
- For myself, my connection with Spirit and surrendering to a higher power, having the FAITH that God/Universe hasn’t failed me yet, (I’ve always made it) so why in the Hell would I think he/she would let me down now.
- Remembering all the times in the past when the BEST, greatest, most wonderful, and out-of-the-blue miraculous things, situations, or people came to me, I usually didn’t plan it, (it just “happened”)
- I keep a gratitude journal, or a “God Wink” journal, or synchronicity journal (call it what you want), this helps me remember all the things I’m grateful for, and doing this brings MORE things into my life to be grateful fore
- I’m a firm believer in tithing, (touchy subject for some). I believe by giving back I’m sending a message to the Universe that I TRUST that it will continue to fill my cup runneth over, (the Universe abhors a vacuum), and I’m keeping the circle going, recirculating the energy to continue to do what it does best, (I can honestly say I’ve never met a “former” tither)
- Practice staying in the present moment, when we aren’t obsessing about the past (which we can’t change anyway, only our thoughts about it) or worrying about the future, we can let go of control. I heard a quote this past week “Worry is only a prayer to bring to you what you already don’t want!” Think about that quote the next time you decide to worry.
Look at it this way, think about the first time you tried to float on your back in a swimming pool or lake, you had to TRUST and LET GO or else you couldn’t stay afloat. Life is like floating on your back, surrender and trust that God has a better plan NOT you.
The Zodiac Flavors of the month for a discounted Solar Return are Aquarius, Pisces, and Aries. If you’re next up to bat, email me [email protected] with your birth data and I’ll put you next up in the batting order.
If any of what I have to say hits home or touches your soul feel free to drop a coin on the Angel Wings above. Be grateful this week, surrender and let go of the “C” word that is sabotaging your success.
I love you and thank you for allowing me to serve,
