WHY DO WE STILL SEEK APPROVAL FROM OUR PARENTS?
I woke up at 1:30am this morning and couldn’t get back to bed, then the next thing I looked at the clock and it was 2:30am. OK enough is enough, I’m just going to get up and write a blog! Isn’t this what writers do? Get up in the wee hours of the morning and write? I’d like to say, that would be wonderful if I lived on the coast overlooking the lapping of the waves from my window on the top floor of my castle-type home, sipping on a latte, without a care in the world except what time of day I am going to write.
Unfortunately, that is NOT my life, at least not yet. Instead I’m writing this because I can’t sleep, because I’m obsessed (well maybe a tad) with trying to figure out why I can’t ever seem to get it right when it comes to my dad. Maybe the problem is ME, not him. Me of all people should know approval starts with the self, it comes from the inside, not the outside. After all, we all know (at least most of us) about the Louise Hay mirror work, right? Hell, I taught enough Louise Hay groups I should have a PHD in looking in the mirror, and saying “I love & approve of myself!”
Well, we all need a refresher from time-to-time, don’t we? Damn straight we do! In lieu of the subject at hand “why do we still seek approval from our parents?” I’m going to give you my thoughts on the matter, not that I’m the expert on the subject. However, I have had a great deal of experience vying for my dad’s approval over the last sixty some years.
Here goes:
- ever since we came out of the womb those were the people who were there (or not there) depending on your situation
- your father was the head honcho (in most scenarios) and what he said was golden, (or so I thought)
- as little children, (and then big adults) we want the praise, the attention, the glory of winning, the admiration, after all doesn’t everybody?
- we just want to believe we’re good at something, anything
- we want to be noticed, even if the attention is bad, at least we’re noticed, right?
What can we do about it? Unless you’ve mastered Teri-Cole Whitaker’s “What You Think of Me Is None of My Business” then these are my suggestions:
- write a letter to your dad (or mom/or both) but don’t send it, writing is cathartic (although I fully intend to send mine)
- ask yourself WHY do you seek the approval? (everyone’s answer may be different) If you ‘think’ you don’t know why, then tell yourself “if you if you DID know why, what would the answer be”
- start a list of all the things you KNOW you do well, & reread it several times throughout your day, week, month, (however long it takes)
- get back to doing your “mirror work” (you heard me, basic Louise Hay 101)
- tell yourself, you do the things you do because you CHOOSE to, because it’s YOUR life, and because it’s what you WANT to do
- practice on the people in your world who may not mean as much to you as your parents (the postman, the cashier at the store, the person walking down the street) by not trying to get “their” approval
- be kind to yourself, get a massage, take a bubble bath, do something just for you without caring about ANYONE’S approval
That’s all I got for you, now it’s almost 4am, & I should finish this blog and go back to bed…
The Sun enters Aquarius today at 9:55am/EST
Motto for Sun-in-Aquarius:
“It’s better to be a round peg in a square hole
than a snug-fitting square peg.”
As the Sun enters Aquarius you may notice a divine discontent begins brewing inside. Every 30 days, the Sun sets a new agenda. In Capricorn, the Sun asked you to stake out your “square”—to secure your place in the social structure. This season you might notice the ways in which this role doesn’t quite fit. A bright new truth may be stirring in your heart.
Your unique point of view is what counts now–from January 19 through February 18. There may be something only you can see–something undesirable or obsolete in your world of sharp corners. Aquarius may increase your sensitivity to the stimulating and aggravating realm of the collective—whatever tribe you currently embrace or oppose. Your inner genius may want to revolutionize this status quo. Take such thoughts seriously. Don’t worry too much about what others will think: innovation is rarely consensual. If the Sun stopped at Capricorn, we’d be all duty but no progress. (taken from Moon Circles)
Why It’s Important to Have Your Solar Return Done Click here for Article & Solar Return Specials
Click here for Martin Luther King Personal Year Numerology Special (even though it says Veteran’s Day, I’m honoring it for Martin Luther King Day)
Thanks for you continued support, Much Gratitude & Blessings,
Eva Starr
